Well, I should not have been surprised. The ending, at least of this phase of the ordeal, was much as the rest of the process so far. The prosecutor's office forgot to notify me of the disposition hearing. So, neither I nor my daughter got an opportunity to say anything before the court rendered its opinion and disposition.
The disposition was that the neighbor boy is to have no contact with my daughter, no unsupervised contact with children younger than some specified age - I don't remember - and there are safeguards in place in the home, so that he can't be wandering around in the house without his parents knowing about it, etc. There is some sort of professional counseling as well. And, at any time, if he violates the restrictions, he will immediately be incarcerated for a minimum of one year.
There was a follow-up hearing on July 31st. I was able to speak at that one, since we weren't invited to the disposition hearing. My daughter wanted to speak, too, up until about 3 days before the hearing. I felt much the same way, but went anyway.
I told them that we were friends with these people, or at least had been, and that when the issue came to light, it was devastating to us all. All we wanted was for the children to get the help that they needed - all of the children. Almost immediately, though, as soon as I sought help from anyone, all control of the situation was taken away from us, and the result seemed a bit like killing a fly with a sledge hammer. [I don't know why, but I still have great sympathy for what that family must be going through, and I still think maybe the boy may also be a victim. I hope he yet gets the help he needs.]
I told them that my daughter wanted to tell them how much she missed playing with her best friend, and that she was no longer angry with the boy.
Of course, I was totally blubbering through all of it.
After I spoke, the boy's parents and the boy each had opportunities to speak. None of them ever turned to say a word to me. There was no acknowledgement at all of what I had said. I was a bit shocked and dismayed by that.
I suspect that those two best friends, who have been practically inseparable since about age 3, will never see each other again, except perhaps in passing. It's very sad.
Thanks for reading. I'll update again if there are any future developments as a result of all of this. I expect there to be some issues when my daughter is a teen. We'll see.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Plea Hearing
The plea hearing was today. NB admitted to one charge of felony rape and 1 or 2 charges of GSI. (I'll have to check my notes.) The good news in that is that DD will not have to testify in court. She will not have to tell her story again, unless she wants to at some point in time.
The prosecutor wanted the one rape charge, because it would require the detailed sexual offender evaluation period before disposition of the case. There is a thick booklet of questions to be posed and answered. The prosecutor said I would be surprised at the answers they sometimes get.
Children who have been abused themselves will often answer TRUE to questions like the following:
True or False: Touching a child in a sexual way shows that you love them.
True or False: Doing sexual things to or with a child is okay if you don't hurt the child physically.
The purpose of the I and R (Investigation and Referral) evaluation is to determine how likely NB is to be a repeat offender.
After that process is complete (should be 4-6 weeks), then there will be a disposition hearing.
I or my daughter, or both of us, may speak at that hearing before the judge declares the disposition of the case. I will probably talk about some of what I posted earlier with regard to my frustrations with the process and how little control I had over that process as the parent of the victim.
As it turns out, my daughter says she also wants to speak. We'll talk more between now and then, so that I can get a better idea of what she might want to say, either to the judge, to the boy, or to his parents. We'll see where that goes.
The prosecutor wanted the one rape charge, because it would require the detailed sexual offender evaluation period before disposition of the case. There is a thick booklet of questions to be posed and answered. The prosecutor said I would be surprised at the answers they sometimes get.
Children who have been abused themselves will often answer TRUE to questions like the following:
True or False: Touching a child in a sexual way shows that you love them.
True or False: Doing sexual things to or with a child is okay if you don't hurt the child physically.
The purpose of the I and R (Investigation and Referral) evaluation is to determine how likely NB is to be a repeat offender.
After that process is complete (should be 4-6 weeks), then there will be a disposition hearing.
I or my daughter, or both of us, may speak at that hearing before the judge declares the disposition of the case. I will probably talk about some of what I posted earlier with regard to my frustrations with the process and how little control I had over that process as the parent of the victim.
As it turns out, my daughter says she also wants to speak. We'll talk more between now and then, so that I can get a better idea of what she might want to say, either to the judge, to the boy, or to his parents. We'll see where that goes.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Third Pretrial
The third pretrial was this morning. It was a waste of time. The defense attorney had not presented any plea options to the family. So, the prosecutor again, more formally, made a plea agreement offer, and it will be taken to the family. The 4th and final pretrial will be January 29th at 11:30a.m.
If I were a cynical person, I'd say the defense attorney is playing around to pad his billable hours to the family. But, I'm not a cynical person, so I won't say that.
The prosecutor did say that while there are a variety of combinations of charges that would work, she won't settle for less than one count of rape. That will result in the full sexual offender evaluation process, etc. That takes 4-6 weeks, and the disposition will follow that.
Sigh.
If I were a cynical person, I'd say the defense attorney is playing around to pad his billable hours to the family. But, I'm not a cynical person, so I won't say that.
The prosecutor did say that while there are a variety of combinations of charges that would work, she won't settle for less than one count of rape. That will result in the full sexual offender evaluation process, etc. That takes 4-6 weeks, and the disposition will follow that.
Sigh.
