Well, I should not have been surprised. The ending, at least of this phase of the ordeal, was much as the rest of the process so far. The prosecutor's office forgot to notify me of the disposition hearing. So, neither I nor my daughter got an opportunity to say anything before the court rendered its opinion and disposition.
The disposition was that the neighbor boy is to have no contact with my daughter, no unsupervised contact with children younger than some specified age - I don't remember - and there are safeguards in place in the home, so that he can't be wandering around in the house without his parents knowing about it, etc. There is some sort of professional counseling as well. And, at any time, if he violates the restrictions, he will immediately be incarcerated for a minimum of one year.
There was a follow-up hearing on July 31st. I was able to speak at that one, since we weren't invited to the disposition hearing. My daughter wanted to speak, too, up until about 3 days before the hearing. I felt much the same way, but went anyway.
I told them that we were friends with these people, or at least had been, and that when the issue came to light, it was devastating to us all. All we wanted was for the children to get the help that they needed - all of the children. Almost immediately, though, as soon as I sought help from anyone, all control of the situation was taken away from us, and the result seemed a bit like killing a fly with a sledge hammer. [I don't know why, but I still have great sympathy for what that family must be going through, and I still think maybe the boy may also be a victim. I hope he yet gets the help he needs.]
I told them that my daughter wanted to tell them how much she missed playing with her best friend, and that she was no longer angry with the boy.
Of course, I was totally blubbering through all of it.
After I spoke, the boy's parents and the boy each had opportunities to speak. None of them ever turned to say a word to me. There was no acknowledgement at all of what I had said. I was a bit shocked and dismayed by that.
I suspect that those two best friends, who have been practically inseparable since about age 3, will never see each other again, except perhaps in passing. It's very sad.
Thanks for reading. I'll update again if there are any future developments as a result of all of this. I expect there to be some issues when my daughter is a teen. We'll see.
In July 2008, my babysitter called me. She was in tears. My 7yo daughter and her best friend had told her that they were being sexually abused by the best friend's 13yo brother, who was also my daughter's before-school babysitter for most of the last school year. Bottom line: I paid him to spend time alone, in my house, with my daughter. I thought I knew him. If this blog saves one child, I will be thrilled. If you are new to the blog, read the old stuff from the bottom up. It's worth it.
